I don’t crave the high/rush that comes immediately after using. I find that I crave the sense of “calm/normal” that it gives me starting about 30-45 minutes after using that can last for up to maybe 8 hours. I honestly don’t feel ok or like myself without something being in me. Idk if it’s due to my drastically out of wack chemical composition or what but using is the only way I find I can be “ok” with me.