I am 44 years old &amp; have struggled w addiction of some form my whole life. I’ve been on heroin awhile now. I am desperate to get off. I have tried so many times &amp; even w suboxone I am still deathly Ill. The acute withdrawals last literally a month&amp; that’s just the horrible chills &amp; heart palpitations. I really really don’t kno what to do. Please help. I have an aging mom &amp; 1 16 year old daughter . They need me &amp; im so depressed &amp; depleted from the heroine that I can’t be a good mom daughter or anything rite now. I was jus desperate going thru the internet looking at Bible scripture  I have never ever been suicidal by any means no matter what I was going thru but lately I have entertained the thought of hoping maybe I go out on a shot so I won’t have to line like this any more. I know that’s crazy. Some of my closest friends &amp; I guy a date for 3 years died this year from it. The guy wax in my bed when he died &amp; I blame myself for it. I lost another relationship that I should’ve kept. forever but I can’t bc I can’t get off this stuff. I am losing myself.  Damn I sound so desperate I kno. I guess I am. If there is any way u can help me. I don’t have any $. I have Medicaid is all. Maybe y’all could take me on as an experimental type thing.???? Anyway I had to try 